The Texas boys, our grandsons Will and Steven, were up for spring break last week. I thought it was an absolutely wonderful visit, and I’m sure my husband, Steve, will too — once he can stand up straight again without pain! Not that he hasn’t spent years raising active little boys, but let’s face it — hours of backyard baseball and trying to get a kite off the ground by repeatedly running backwards like a demented escapee from the loony bin, isn’t as easy for him as it used to be. (Who knew there could be three consecutive windless days in Oklahoma!)

We also managed to visit the mall arcade three times, where $50 in quarters netted us a water snake, a fine set of fake teeth, a keychain, a pencil and a skeleton head copper-colored bracelet covered with fake rubies so exquisite, Will was sure his Dad would want one the minute he laid eyes on it.

No visit with the boys would be complete without some spiky ball tennis (played with those annoying little balls that fall from sweet gum trees), bowling, water gun fights, drawing pictures of a naked granddad on the driveway with sidewalk chalk and spending hours looking for “Waldo” in the same book we’ve been searching since 1989. Now that the boys are 6 and 3, we’re even able to have a spirited game of “Name That Tune” where the two of them always manage to stump us with their oft-repeated rendition of a boy-ish sounding ditty they made up called, “I Like to Kill People.” (A song NOT approved of by their mother, I might add!)

These young brothers get along really well. It certainly helps they share a sense of humor, as well as a sense of adventure. The only skirmishes of the week involved a very large inexpensive plastic ball and a foam rubber sword. I’m sure you can imagine what might have happened there. Let’s just say there were time-outs involved before someone (their above-mentioned mom!) finally removed the ball from the scene of the crime.

I know I love every crazy minute of their little grandboy antics because it brings back memories of my own little boys. When I was a young mother, it never occurred to me to wonder what the difference between raising boys and girls might be, or that there would even be much of a difference. Since I only had the boy kind, I just dove in and tried to keep my head above water in a pool full of knobby knees and baggy shorts.

But I have wondered over the years, and especially now that I have an amazingly unique granddaughter, if the difference between the sexes is hard-wired at birth or the result of gender bias on the part of society. I’ve read about studies suggesting there are definite brain chemistry differences — that the higher level of testosterone in males encourages the right side of the brain to develop faster than the left. That seems to go along with the theory girls have a better developed left side, which gives them an edge in areas of language — speaking it and understanding it.

Dr. Norman Geschwind, a behavioral neurologist, believes in this theory. He says it explains why aggression in boys usually takes the form of physical encounters, while girls tend to show aggression through more verbal means. A boy might throw a punch, but a girl, being more tuned in to the emotions of others, is more apt to attack with words that pack some sting. (Though I once saw a physical girl-fight in front of Emerson Junior High that was positively riveting!)

It’s my opinion boys are just more about “what you see is what you get.” Their agendas are more in evidence, with less give and take — a bit more declarative and a little less chatty just for the sake of the chat!

So, do I prefer arm wrestling at the breakfast table to shopping for nail polish at Claire’s? I’ll be sure to mull that over during the next invigorating game of backyard baseball followed by a possible eye injuring game of the ever-popular spiky ball tennis!

P.S. By the way, does anyone else think it odd renting a pair of used bowling shoes costs more than a game of bowling?



Peck, a local mother and grandmother who works in Enid Public Schools, can be reached at peckaroonie@yahoo.com